a note to my side b family

I want to send a short message to my beloved LGBT family who embrace the traditional sexual ethic.
For various reasons, you chose either a celibate, chaste life and or mixed orientation marriage.
It’s been a little less than a year that I’ve chosen a different path and a small number of my 
“Side B” friends have reached out to me to both express their heart and also ask questions.

Everyone’s journey and experience are unique, and I have no blanket statement of what life is like on the other side. I will offer something that I think may be of value for your continued walk along the path of intentional celibacy.

Our faith tradition as Christians has given us several examples that realign our imagination and heart to the reality that we are not alone.
To often there can be a preoccupancy in our emotions and thoughts about being “alone”
Society and culture say we must be romantically connected to someone and subconsciously and consciously we internalize that message.
I know when I first became affirming I bought into this and immediately sought companionship. I’ve tried a few times within this past year to enter into a relationship and it hasn’t panned out.
Each time has left me in heart break.
In my pursuit of something tangible through closeness and committed intimacy with another (that very human drive that points to our deeper relatedness to God) I’d lost sight of the deeply satisfying reality that I am already connected to God and how meditating on that would impact my thoughts about being alone.

So here’s a reminder.

We have the Paraclete. The Holy Spirit of God, the third identity of the Trinity given as a gift, companion, and aid. As the greek word implies, the Paraclete is God coming alongside us.

Real Presence.

Real Comfort.

Not only does God come along side us and not only did God incarnate into flesh to live amongst us,teaching us and reconciling us …but God also left the gift of Image within each of us.
God’s Self at the core of our being is an incredible gift that I’m reinvesting my energies lately to rediscover.

Wading through and pass the muck of my own illusions, striving, and ego.

Remembering paced, deep breaths throughout the day so as to release any negativity or stress.

Through mindfulness, contemplation, and meditation my desire is to awake to the reality of my truest self.

My truest self that is love.

My truest self that is an extension of God.
Talk about never being alone!

Who we really are is an extension of God?

In our deepest depths beyond emotion and mind, is God?

Yes, friend.

Breathe that in.

Image of God at the center and ground of our very being.

We are never alone.

So as you commit to celibacy and a chaste life be encouraged by this.

Remind yourself (and others also) of this beautiful truth often.

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